Friday, May 29, 2009

Last weekend one of my Korean friends, who is now studying in New York, came to pay Chicago a visit with his friend.

This is a friend whom I had met once upon his hungover time in the McDonald's in Seocho's Express Bus Terminal. He took an interest in me--so much so that he even insisted on introducing me to his sister and his girlfriend--and we had met a few more times before he re-embarked on a second educational journey to and in America. I was appreciative of the fact that this had happened, especially since he was a Korean man who not only intuited (so he says, and without subsequent denial) my attraction to men but also was comfortable and unfettered enough to have had no problems with said attraction. Albeit he had previously been sufficiently exposed to this taboo-at-best (if not outright denied) mutant-type in America, the two of us had met in Korea--so I was appreciative of this.

He and I were to meet later in the day--namely, in the evening--so there was some meandering downtown prior to this reunion. Having been quite conscious of my imploding budget line, nothing was purchased save the Chipotle lunch that reestablished good relations between the chain and me, and the prepaid cellphone from AT&T, which was the pre-iPhone purchase (the iPhone will be purchased immediately before returning overseas). Mere meandering and an iota of curiosity brought about a landing in ex-part-time fling Abercrombie & Fitch and its newer brother Hollister across from it. While the former hardly had anything worth viewing twice homo sapiens- or attire-wise, the latter verily had a few tempting tops in it (no, not those tops; there was an 8:1 female:male ratio, anyway). The Apple store was also paid a visit for its gratis internet service and answers about the iPhone.

This mini-journey downtown did not go without pictures. Behold.

You have upon you the Trump Tower grayscale...making the adjacent buildings appear askew.

There was some street corner entertainment, which I didn't get to appreciate due to the statute of stature limitations. Well, there appears to have been space to the left, but not only were some of the people to the left not captured in this free-click aerial photo but seeing the stunt was not worth painstaking trying to see.

On the way to meet my friend, the big white "Tokyo" caught these eyes. Although this photograph of Asian Expression on Ohio St. would have presented just as well in grayscale, still turned out pretty well. The Ginza (銀座) Restaurant to the left will be mentioned later in this post.

Lagniappe! That's part of my author name on here! ^ ^

One may have a glimpse at Trump Tower Chicago nearly camouflaging in the background.

The Macro setting without the programmed flash would have been nice. :/

Sans flash. Quality forgone. These flowers on Clark St. were seen on the way to the rendezvous anyway.

After this point, I met up with my friend, who had brought along a friend of his. Like my friend, he is a student in America. A cute, rather sweet (alarms a-bewailing) one, too.

The plan was to go to Vision (a downtown club), but the club was not to open until 10 p.m. In the three-and-a-half hours to squander, I take my touring friend and newly-made acquaintance to Millennium Park. Picture time (!):

He would be the friend, who is standing beside Fat-Looking, Geriatric-Looking Me. = =

I detest that orange bag provided by AT&T and/or I wish I had been wearing white whilst in possession of it. Anyway, this is a picture of us under the concave underbelly of The Bean (properly called Cloud Gate).

No, this pose actually was not my idea.

With time still left until the anticipated opening of the club, we decided to have dinner at the Ginza Restaurant, of which I had made mention earlier. It was rather undeservedly demanding of our wallets not only because of the quantity but also the quality of the food. If you're going to try to Tokyo in Chicago by being expensive, then you ought to Tokyo by offering the same quality of a good/service.

After the slightly-but-still-noticeably pocket-slimming dinner, I found out that my best friend from college is going to be joining the three of us. Nearly an hour's worth of time remained until the club was to open, and pre-gaming seemed to be a good idea because of the anticipated inflation in alcohol prices of a downtown club. There was a liquor store just a few paces down from Ginza Restaurant and Tokyo Hotel, a very smart strategic move on the shopowner's part. They bought soju and beer to make a rather deadly, somewhat ubiquitous concoction from Korea: maekju. Passing by reflex (thanks to aversion conditioning to clear alcohols--thanks to soju and the collateral damage it caused--in Korea), I looked for a rather small bottle of wine because I didn't want to be pixilated before clubbing. None of the bottles were too small or just right, nor did any of them have a price tag that was too good to refuse. Consciousness of that (still) gradually imploding budget line had worked to my financial favor. ^^/= = I could have bought something else, but I preferred to wait until the arrival of my other friend.

(Spoiler: My friend ended up wanting nothing from the liquor store. What was saved from not having bought anything from that store was just spent at the club.)

After the liquor store, there was a problem: Where were they to consume this alcohol?

Answer: Rock 'N Roll McDonald's. Had this been Korea, refuge wouldn't need to be taken in McDonald's. Anyway, they had to clandestinely consume (using two McDonald's cups attained from the counter downstairs) inside the Rock 'N Roll McDonald's (this Rock 'N Roll McDonalds has two floors), so it wasn't necessarily a safe haven. Our purpose was accomplished though, and there was even a picture or two:

This will be the only one shared on here for now.

My friend arrived and I introduced her to the other two friends of mine. After just a few minutes of small talk, however, some of us were more ready to be on our way to the club...which was only a block away from Rock 'N Roll.

The $20 cover charge gained us entry into a three-floor club barren of the vivacious (well, as vivacious as Chicago has potential to be) Saturday nightlife. Rather disillusioned, simply leaving was an option, but then we were allowed into the more exclusive (curtained off) part of the the basement..for an extra $10, which pays for the negligible amount of space that one's cock occupies in this exclusive space. My, what a liability having a phallus has become!

My friend had told me that this was to be an all-Asian event, and he was quite accurate. Interestingly more lively than its upstairs counterpart, I was the only non-Asian amongst all the clubbers in the basement...other than another group of four. Although Asian-Americans and Asians in America differ greatly from de-/un-Americanized Asians, the fact that I have had experience living in Asia made me even more comfortable being the only Other in the matrix...other than of four, none of whose members I knew anyway.

The night didn't turn out how any of us had been expecting.

So, an attempt by my Korean friend to have the four of us split a $150 bottle, gin-n-tonics and Jägerbombs, taking the party to the dancefloor, some hybridization of the crowd, misunderstandings of whereabouts which led to misunderstandings of extents of friendships, my best friend from college returning home, awkwardly trail-stalking my visiting friend (and neutralizing him against a potential rival) to ensure his staying in one piece, and an allowance of the previously consumed alcohol to have its soporific effects on me-- later,

...refuge was once again taken at the Rock 'N Roll McDonald's. Deciding to make this a frugal visit by planning to spend the night a-dancing and a-drinking, they hadn't reserved a hotel room. My visiting friend's stomach was very much rejecting the alcohol he had so quickly consumed, and I was still under the soporific influence (well, I had also been awake since nine o'clock or so). My newly-made acquaintance, however, seemed to be just fine. Being unable to focus my attention or keep my eyes open, I apologized for being unable to keep him company during his wait for the first train bound to Wisconsin (where he is studying). I know that I was failing in his eyes, even if he did say that it was ok; he was left sitting in front of me with his iPod with fifty billion after-partiers around him in a city with which he was not familiar. = =

Approximately forty five minutes later, he woke me from me from my alcohol sleep-off because it was time for him and my visiting friend to go to Union Station to catch the Wisconsin-bound train. It was a simple ending, really: After my new acquaintance shaking hands with me, he had to tell the still disequilibrated friend of mine to say goodbye to me. He. Had. To. Tell. Him. Either he was that far gone from partying--Koreans know how to party hardy--or the turn of the good day affected our friendship that much. I didn't really analyze this for a very long time, though, because it was noticeably cooler outside at 6:00 a.m.

Briskly pacing to the Metra Station in said cold weather, I tried to capture "6:15 a.m. Chicago". There was no exposure at which this scene would have presented perfectly in the photograph (but different exposures were attempted). = =

The Christian Science building would of course be the better picture. Great quality; too bad it's compressed here.

The 6:30 train was caught...and with it, massive bloating &c. An attempt to read the Onion, followed by falling asleep on the train (as I am wont to do), successfully delayed any urges. Thank goodness I was to be back in a short time at that place at which I'm staying, right?


The new cell phone had been used to call and apprise of my returning back to the area. Neither of the times that I had called was there a response. Passing my destination in hopes that one of the stations further along the line would have a bathroom that wasn't constantly locked...only resulted in the gained knowledge that such stations offer nothing more than my destination.

Returning to the station that was my destination, I called again to no avail (and the number to a local taxi service wasn't available at the time). Since being on my feet was much better, I started exercising. I started walking. There was quite a long walk ahead...

...which actually turned out being refreshing. On Sunday morning at 8:00 a.m., the only people on the road are churchgoers and the city-bound (which are few in number on a Sunday morning). It took a long while, and the 62 degrees made it comfortable to be walking with a black camera bag while garbed in black clothing...and I was able to stop at a Speedway to micturate some of the alcohol away (or what seemed to be the 1 pL of it that had remained)!

Some time later (just exactly how much time will remain undisclosed ^ ^), your little intron Barbie was nearing the Target that is near the Place of Temporary Stay. It was open, and the cleanliness of their "facilities" was nearly comparable to that of the ones at Singapore Changi Airport! Near-emergencies (and at a specific point during my Sunday morning Target shopping, it was an emergency) make one utilize public facilities even if they are generally avoided. It was aah-mazing.

A purchase of more sunscreen and canned cherries for a to-be-made cobbler later, I walked the rest of the way to my destination. It was a solid exercise...unintentional, but solid. Much of the day was spent napping, and that's really where this story ends. How symbolic, given that this place is also where my life (temporarily) ends.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

下午安! 最近我應該決定,我回到韓國去還是到臺灣去? 我想要了在臺北市住,所以我寧可出到那裡。 我跟一些臺灣的朋友,如此我心中臺灣有比較有好的人。可是因特網的友誼跟面對面的友誼不一樣啦! 我出從韓國去了之前,心中在中東 ...伊朗,沙烏地阿拉伯,毛利塔尼亞 (不真的中東),埃及和蘇丹-後者的國也不真的中東。 現在不知道--我的現錢在韓國著,也泥節在那裡。另一方面臺北的天氣全年中比韓國城市都的天氣更好! 我喜歡溫暖的天氣! 所以。。。。。。。。還沒決定了。 ^^


Friday, May 22, 2009

Enablement Day has come and gone. Paranoia about potentially lurking Mail Purloiners was quelled, for The Envelope was delivered to the door rather than left conspicuously in the mailbox for questionably knavish Idlers and Lurkers. God was thanked for the safe arrival of my enabler.

However, this enablement hardly seemed like an empowerment. Only a portion of the convertible checks traveled trans-Pacifically; Conservative Me eliminated the risk of losing everything by safeguarding the rest of the checks in this place. Much like many conservative investments, the return was low. This was realized subsequent to having counted the amount of American cash received. The utter lack of wherewithal had caused me to delude myself into exaggerating the value of that which I was to receive.

The outcome? The exercise of restraint learned from having had not, which is better than regression to Square Zero through prodigality. The previous Saturday was spent with Stacey on the North Side and in Hyde Park; unfortunately no pictures were taken. The next day consisted of somewhat mild spending: much needed alfalfa for the bunny Bunnicula, by whom I was bitten for the first time (much to my surprise), equally needed DVD recordables (which are temporarily replacing my dying external hard drive) and headphones from Best Buy, and various supplies from Target. From these supplies, many were for what are upcoming baking projects!

The site from which I had taken the recipe for iced brownies was bookmarked in my mind for some of the aforehinted baking projects; there were too many scrumptious opportunities to forego. I considered baking one of these brownie recipes for my brother's graduation, but I figured that prior investment in a cake from a bakery had already thwarted that idea. Therefore, the baking came two days later:

Chewy Peanut Butter Brownies

1/2 cup peanut butter
1/3 cup margarine, softened
2/3 cup white sugar
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
2 egg
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt

Aside: Cherry pie was preferred, but an inadequate amount of canned cherries had been purchased.

The brownies turned out well albeit chocolate chipless. >< Should these be made in the future, more baking powder shall be added, for buff is good!

See? Much like the aforeposted Korean singer. From the the salivation-inducing the the well-defined rectus the inguinals... /censor southerly-oriented thoughts and apodyopses.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Sheer boredom has temporarily been supplanted by...baking and liaisons with TV shows!

Surely everyone extended kindly gestures to their mothers today. It is for this reason (Mother's Day) that baking has come to be one of the methods through which utter boredom can be suppressed. Pecuniarily incapacitated (until the end of this week!), I was left with the internet and limited baking goods, which included brownie mix. Determined to make brownies, product from a boxed brownie mix would have been too easy. In a crusade for culinary creativity (relatively speaking) in this kitchen, recruitment of the internet was only the most naturally strategic first step.

Google landed me a recipe of Rachel Ray's brownie ice cream sandwiches. Palatable it could have been, but I am quite sure that she prefers a separation of hards and softs. A Google search for "brownie recipes" later and I had before me an array of submitted brownie recipes on What separated me from actually materializing many of these brownies in the kitchen was my limited budget of materials.

Red=Had Not

Applesauce Brownies


* 1 1/2 cups white sugar
* 1/2 cup margarine
* 2 eggs
* 2 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
* 1 1/2 teaspoons salt

* 2 cups applesauce
* 1 teaspoon baking soda
* 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
* 2 cups all-purpose flour
* 2 tablespoons white sugar
* 1 cup semisweet chocolate chips
* 1 cup chopped walnuts

Cheesecake-Topped Brownie


* 1 (21.5 ounce) package brownie mix
* 1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese (LESS THAN ONE YEAR PAST THE DATE ON THE BOX), softened
* 2 tablespoons butter, softened
* 1 tablespoon cornstarch

* 1 (14 ounce) can sweetened condensed milk
* 1 egg
* 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
* 1 (16 ounce) container prepared chocolate frosting

Extra-EXTRA Rich Brownies (Of course the alliciency was in the words "extra" and "rich".)


* 1 1/8 cups all-purpose flour
* 3/4 teaspoon baking powder
* 3/4 teaspoon salt
* 1 cup white sugar
* 1 1/2 cups unsweetened cocoa powder
* 2/3 cup vegetable oil
* 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

* 3/4 cup evaporated milk (I didn't feel like making any)
* 1/2 cup evaporated milk
* 1/3 cup sweetened cocoa mix
* 1 teaspoon butter

After much browsing and contemplation, the recipe of choice, which also matched my budget set of ingredients was Iced Brownie!


* 1 cup sugar
* 1/2 cup butter or margarine, softened
* 4 eggs
* 1 (16 ounce) can chocolate flavored syrup (like Hershey's or Nestle's chocolate syrup!)
* 1 cup all-purpose flour
* 1/2 cup chopped nuts (forgone, for I didn't think that my mother would have had an appreciation for the nuts)
* 1 1/4 cups sugar
* 6 tablespoons butter or margarine
* 6 tablespoons milk or light cream
* 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
* 1 cup semisweet chocolate chips

Recruitment successful.

The Iced Brownie is somewhat normal in the sense that it is a brownie, but an equally rich icing is separately prepared to spread about the cake's surface at the end. The pleasures derived from using this recipe are as follows:

  • Double the Orgulosity: When bragging to one's friends about one's awesome baking skills, he or she is able to boast not only of an awesome brownie but also of an equally amazing icing.

  • Double the Gustatory Indulgence: Not only will one's papillae be walking like Egyptians from a sample (or two, or seventeen) of the batter but also the savory icing (maraschino cherries were added and squashed inside the icing) will crowd surf across said papillae, allowing one to savor the sample just long enough before tumbling down the throat.

  • Adding more vanilla extract than that which had been instructed.

  • Behold the finished brownie-cake:

    The cherry chocolate icing hadn't completely cooled, so the decorative icing partially melted into the cherry chocolate icing. Much thanks to Impatience, the word "Mother's" had to be reiced twice. The cake was appreciated, and it was delectable.

    It was even more delectable than what one would imagine this morsel of pulchritude to be:

    I mentioned how TV shows have also alleviated this systemic boredom of mine. Behold, undress, salivate (manstuprate, too). Jonathan Rhys Meyers, purveyor of fine 16th century douchebaggery à la Henry VIII on the TV show The Tudors. Perhaps to some, "douchebaggery" is a vast oversimplification or a contemptible display of underappreciation of history. The show isn't completely verisimilitudinous of its time anyway, but it's no Troy.

    Both the show and the actor had heretofore been ignored. The character portrayed in the TV show accentuates Meyers' good looks. Dark hair-light eye combinations are very attractive, misunderstand me not...but he was of too 'gay' a semblance. However, this is no longer an issue.

    In contrast, this Flight of the Conchords star Bret McKenzie took only two or three episodes to be considered attractive in these eyes:

    Far from photogenic, his personality/character on the show accentuates the rugged good looks of this New Zealander. One may see for him- or herself on the show, which is about two New Zealanders that are trying to subsist and rise in New York (much like all the others who sojourn or settle in New York). They, however, comedically do so through folkish (comedic) rap and hip-hop music (they're actually a performing duo irl), working with a disutility of a New Zealander "agent" (Murray), and being consistently creeped out by the sole (yet soso cute) member of their fan base (Mel). For those who have no access to HBO, there is always SurftheChannel.

    Thursday, May 07, 2009

    現在從韓國的我的現錢還沒到我。想問對我的朋友為甚麼他沒送它。 在Facebook,AIM,他都不上線啊!不生氣,但我要知道我能受現錢的時候。住在紐約的韓國的朋友於5月20日跟我想去市區。 這件等待把我逼瘋了!


    Monday, May 04, 2009

    From this anticipation of greenery in my hands has come a tsunami of hebetative boredom toppling all that which formerly kept buoyant my relative tolerance of this place and of the company of Monotony in this place. The end of the Arrested Development series has left a void in my television-viewing experience...and resuming Entourage may have expanded the circumference of that hole.

    Months ago, after much hype regarding the awesomeness of the show, decompression from the social pressure was achieved through caving and giving the show a chance. "Awesomeness" seemed like a mere misuse of the word. Given that it was the pilot of the series, such boredom resulted in resumption of watching the series on Tudou.

    Most may already know that Tudou (土豆网 / 土豆網) is the Chinese YouTube (apparently with more minutes streamed than YouTube!). Seemingly commensurate in availability of international content, at least most of the non-Chinese-language TV shows that aren't dubbed have the Chinese subtitles available. Entourage has been useful in this way. Of course a show portraying male lifestyle naturally includes a barrage of expletives, and translations of said expletives provides for more of an appreciation of the show for those whose first language is not English. For this Entourage is also useful. We have, for example, 王八蛋 (wángbādàn), which means "bastard" or "prick" (with various etymological theories here, (只到中文; only in Chinese))--it literally reads "king eight eggs" (or the 蛋 may be suffixed for the sole purpose of insulting another). Update: this (English explanation) may shed a speck of light on the significance of this translation. Another acquired vocabulary term was "我操", to which "fuck me" was translated (I conduct/operate), which one pure-bred Western neophyte of the Chinese language might instinctively and questionably--and naughtily so--flag as a possible mistranslation. Chinese vocabulary and very spotted moments of lols are all that are obtained from the show.

    Entourage is a show that needs no introduction. It is virtually the counterpart of Sex and the City, which pales in comparison to the latter. Whilst representing a broad spectrum of male personae, let's behold our two heroes:

    Ari Gold!

    haㅋ哈. His name is also Ari Gold, but he's an irl gay singer. That was just gratuitously provided DelectableBody.jpg.

    Here is the real Ari Gold who counts. The thankfully straight one. The badass (or maybe not so much?) agent. Smart. Witty. Protective. Super Socialite. Ari Gold.

    Then we have Vincent Chase:

    It's unfortunate that he isn't only a dominant allele away from being Mohinder Suresh's brother...but on Entourage. Rather, this is Vincent:

    Pretty boy. Dweeb. Immature. De trop typical rags-to-riches. The Don Juan. The collateral liability. The drop-dead douchebag vis-à-vis his character in The Devil Wears Prada.

    Of the men, my choice would be Johnny Drama, the latter part of his name being quite accurate.

    He's not as successful as his brother Vincent (one may actually liken him to a leech), but what a man. What a man. Just like his brother, Matt Dillon, but younger and (now) more attractive by a multiple.


    Better shows are available on the Internet, but Ari and Johnny continue to gradually attract this hottie back to the show. It's unfortunate (or fortunate) that the unavailability of Episode Seven has neutralized this gradual attraction. In the meantime, other ways of alleviating this boredom must be sought. > <

    Traducido en español

    De esta anticipación de verdor (dinero) en las manos ha llegado un maremoto de aburrimiento embotando que hace caer todo esto que antes mantuvo el empuje de mi tolerancia relativa de este lugar y de la compañía de Monotonía en este lugar. La conclusión del programa Arrested Development me dejó con un vacío y tal vez la resunción de ver Entourage haga la circunferencia de este vacío a extender.

    Desde meses, después del hype de la formidabilidad de este programa, decompresión de la presión social fue realizado por submitir y darlo una oportunidad. Parece que "formabilidad" simplemente fue un uso incorrecto. Dado que fue el episodio piloto, tanto aburrimiento me causa resumir en continuando con la serie por Tudou.

    Tal vez la mayoría sepa que Tudou (土豆网 / 土豆網) es el YouTube de los chinos ( (solamente hay traducción en alemán, japonés y chino) aparentemente hay más minutos corrientes que los de YouTube!). Parece que el contenido internacional es en proporción a él de YouTube y a lo menos la mayoria de los programas que ni son chinos ni son doblados sí se incluyen los subtítulos chinos. Por eso, Entourage es útil. Por supuesto se incluyen una lluvia de improperios en un programa que representa la vida masculina y traducciones de estos improperios facilitan un agradecimiento del programa para ellos cuya lengua primera no sea inglés. Es también la razon que Entourage es útil. Por ejemplo, tenemos "王八蛋 (wángbādàn), que más o menos significa "cabrón" (hay teorías etimólogas varias aquí (只到中文; solamente traducido en chino)) y se lee palabra por palabra como "rey ochos huevos (quizás se añadie el carácter "蛋" como sufijo solamente para dar insulto a otra persona). Más reciente: es posible que este sitio (explicación en inglés) puede arrojar luz sobre la significación de esta traducción. Otra frase adquirida fue "我操", que ha traducido a "chíngame" (significa yo conduzco o yo opero). Eso es lo que uno que era criado solamente en el Oeste y que es neófito en el idioma chino puede señalar como una mala traducción por instinto y por preguntas (aunque hacerlo es un poco mal). Los que son obtenido del programa son el vocabulario chino y los momentos sporádicos de rs-es.

    Entourage es un programa que no se requiere una introducción. Es prácticamente lo equivalente de Sex and the City, lo cual se vuelve insignificante en comparación con ésto. Mientras que represente un amplio espectro de personajes masculinas, miremos a nuestros dos héroes:

    Ari Gold!

    haㅋ哈. Él también se llama Ari Gold, pero es en realidad un artista musical homosexual. Esa foto fue dada gratuitamente como Cuerpodelicioso.jpg.

    Esa foto es la del significante Ari Gold. Afortunadamente heterosexual. Agudo. Protector. El agente Badass (tal vez no es tan mucho como parece). Supervividor. Ari Gold.

    Entonces hay Vicente Chase:

    Desafortunadamente no hay solamente un alelo de ser el hermano de Mohinder Suresh (pero en Entourage). O mejor dicho, aquí está Vicente:

    Un bonito. Memo. Inmaduro. De trop típico muchacho de pobre a rico. Un Don Juan. La responsabilidad con el potencial de crear daño colateral. Un cabrón que te mueres en relación con el personaje del actor en The Devil Wears Prada.

    De todos los hombres, escogería Jonny Drama, cuya parte última de su nombre es adecuado:

    No tiene tan mucho éxito como su hermano Vicente (se puede compararlo a una lapa), pero qué hombre! Qué hombre! Es como su hermano en realidad, Matt Dillon, pero aquél tiene menos años y (ahora) es más atractivo por un múltiplo.


    Hay mejores programas por la Red, pero Ari y Jonny persisten en gradualmente atrayendo esta guapísima a la vuelta al programa. Es desgracia que la absencia de Episodio Siete haga neutralizado esta atración gradual. Mientras tanto, se han de buscar otras maneras de aliviar este aburrimiento.

    Friday, May 01, 2009

    While corresponding with my friendly ex-coworker (the one who is sending me the aforementioned converted capital) in the early morning hour of 4 a.m., it was only natural that "fml" would come from Your Vexèd Girl in the conversation. As baffling as it may be, never had I ever been to the site. So, while waiting for my correspondent to hit me with a message of awesome, I type "" into the URL box.

    Rather than coming upon a smorgasbord of what I had imagined to be ebullient (yet cathartic!), succinct narrations of events that are soul food for us Schadenfreudephiles, I beheld a website with a free movie on it!

    David & Fatima (2008) is the story about the love between a Muslim and a Jew. In Jerusalem (it was filmed in America, though, and saturated with American actors and actresses--save Martin Landau--with negligible, if existent, Hollywood experience prior to the film). So it was quite fml not only because of the re-reality check regarding the sensitivity of interethnic coexistence (and the consequences of treading outside one's own ethnic boundary) in Jerusalem but also because David wasn't mine. Behold David (he was the Jew, which hopefully was obvious after reading "the story about the love between a Muslim and a Jew":

    There's a culmination, for which you must wait.

    Wait, I guess not. Well, fml.

    Imagine him being five times as melanized, having somewhat longer, oilier hair, and being nearly a decade older than he was in this movie:

    Anyhow, the movie was satisfactory, and it likely would not have been a better experience had I not watched it in Arabic sans English subtitles. It is two hours and you find Yours Truly posting after having finished the movie.

    Where's the site for which I had been searching? That would be this site. This post will end with a few gemmies from that site (and the only ebullient display is the "FML" suffixed to the depressing narration):

    Today, I went to the doctor for a checkup. The doctor went through the normal questions, then paused for a moment and jotted something down. Later when I got back my report from the checkup, I noticed that the doctor had checked the "no" box by "sexually active." She didn't even ask me that. FML.

    Today, I was laying in bed naked and blindfolded. I told my boyfriend he could do anything he wanted to me. About 30 minutes later I get out of bed and find him in the computer room play[sic] World of Warcraft. His friends needed him. FML

    Today, I ran into my serious boyfriend of two years at a restaurant. He was sitting with another girl. I went over and asked him who she was. He replied, "Who are you?" Apparently I was the secret girlfriend. FML

    Today, I found out my girlfriend of 5 years cheated on me. When confronted she told me, "I didn't get wet so it wasn't cheating." FML

    Today, I was babysitting a 4 year-old with a speech impediment. I asked her, "Do you got your bag?" And she said, "No. I have my bag. Babies say got. I'm a big girl." I am 20 years old and in the honors program in my college. I was corrected by a 4 year-old with a speech impediment. FML

    Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML

    My Schadenfreude, albeit far from satiated, is nom-nomming on these scrumptious little gems. These would totally happen to me, by the way...except that the girlfriend would be a hypothetical boyfriend. FML
    Welp, it's the first of May and the plentiful latter days of April showers seem to have brought about the emergence of a few May flowers. Those "flowers" are indeed the ubiquitous dandelions that sprout up as profusely as pimples on the faces of adolescents. This is at least an account of my view from the window of this room, in which I have become increasingly enclosed.

    April lowers are naturally expected to bring May highers--for instance, higher temperatures. During the last weekend in April, Dismal Chicago was hit by temperatures redolent of the beginning of summertime: 80 degrees with a considerable percentage of humidity. Spoiled this city was for two days. Unfortunately yet not unexpectedly, the heat wave left Chicago, and Chicago was left with its all too vacillating weather--e.g. 46 high with rain, 68 high with rain, and 55 high with partial cloudiness, the latter being the weather that started off the Chicagoan's month of May. It wouldn't be too soon for the May highers to arrive and stay a while until the June even highers.

    Also part of these May highers is the very much anticipated awakening of my comatose purchasing power. The Korean bank checks safely arrived in Korea to a friendly ex-coworker. The express mail service through which he said that he would send the converted cash couldn't be express enough. May this converted capital safely arrive in the hands of this abject soul that is all too ready to squander it on Wii, PS3, a new external hard drive, and much needed headphones (since it had been assumed safe to forsake the cheap pairs in Korea). No, that's a lie, for not all of the Korean checks were sent. However, the very much needed external hard drive is certainly being considered (the first one has become demential).

    Aside: Had I sent the entire amount to Korea, oh, the next blog post would have had jpgs of the Wii and PS3 that I certainly would have bought...and jpgs of me giving a CYA wave and deleting from irl.

    In the meantime, the battle against trichotillomania will continue to be unfought, neuronal loss will continue at a rate of 100,000/day, this (for which I will long even more once I finish the last episode of the series):

    ♥ (No, I didn't just hear about and start watching this show; I just never finished watching every episode.)